Follow by Email

Saturday, November 19, 2011

It's always someones something...

Went for a run yesterday, because I'm stubborn.  Snow on the ground enough to steal away most of my sight.  No guide arranged.  No help organized.  This is not uncommon but in the snow... it is a problem.  My run started at my house post school bus, travelled down to the path near my house, travelled up the path for just over 6k and then finally finished back up on the road that brought me to the YMCA for my favourite strength class.  My feet, ever so cautiously moved me towards the trail... usually I can see the trail, the ground that looks bare in front of me.  As if the trees backed up a smidge to allow my passage.  But yesterday, the only hint of  path I could make out.... was nothingness.  This gap in space where something should have been.  But here only brightness existed.  Here only glare to force my eyes shut.  Here only the devilish laughs of doubt.  And still I ran.  I ran as if I were running on a cloud ... visually lost my feet.  I could see my black pants but my shoes dissapeared into the nothingness underfoot.  So running I convinced myself every step I did in fact exist.  I am here... I can feel me.

A lady ran past me.  I said good morning to the movement as she passed. "where did the snow come from" she asked... "Not sure but It makes it hard to see" my response. "to see?" her question... her pace slowing in contemplating thought. "Oh you mean from the glare!" her resolution.. pace picking up again.  Right I thought exactly.

She didn't know this was my day 322.  She didn't know I was a legally blind runner.  She didn't know anything beyond that fate gave us this sunrise to share this trail this moment in time.  She didn't know, nor did she want that responsibility.  She ran.  She seemed free to me... running on the nothingness underfoot. As if a unicorn galloping among the clouds.  And I let her go.  Even though I longed to cling to that vision she could have shared.  I let her travel ahead to the point where she was lost to me among the brightness.  To the point where I couldn't even hear her. 

After all, it may not be her day 322 but it certainly was her something.  Let her be to embrace that something. Let her soul dance in a happy runner tango along this trail.

I ran and ran... Distance was lost to me. It wasn't a long run but I will tell you, if you want to forget how far you have to go... worry instead about falling into the creek along side the path of nothingness.  It will take your mind off time and pace and distance.  Everything becomes ghostly against a backdrop of "stay alive".

I met the lady again after she'd turned around, claiming her half way mark some distance ahead.  "the bridge is slippery" she warning warmly as if her runner courtesy was accomplished.  "thanks" I replied with a smile.... I let her have that moment of warmth in her head.... I did gain knowledge from her words... I now knew there was a bridge coming up.  That was something.  At least I could pretend to not be surprised when I hit it now.  Things were looking up.

I couldn't look up.  Up was all things staring into a flash light. Down made my head spin with my missing feet on the path of nothingness. So I did the only thing I knew how to do... Laugh and run.

When I hit the road again, the ground turned slippery and danger changed dynamics a bit.  Now there was no creek but oncoming traffic to worry about.  People hustled around on the road and the sidewalk I could barely make out.  They had lives to live.  They had errands to run.  They had their somethings today.  Their stories filled my heart as I travelled down the road.  Each step reminding me .... today is not to be wasted.

After all today is always someones something....

Today is my day 323... Current total kms 1755

Go make your today awesome!

No comments: