Oh jumping bean in my cup... how inspiring you are. I wish I could sit calmly and sip. I take that back. I do not wish for that, but can you imagine that quiet? Can you imagine that stillness? My soul does not know such pause. As I sip, I greet new dreams as if they already exist. They flirt with my reality. They jingle around in my tummy, that intuitive place that sets you on fire. In the next moment I say these aspirations out loud. Why, dear coffee in my cup, do you move me so? Why, dear coffee in my cup, do you speak my words before I think them through? Why, dear coffee in my cup, do you create that feeling of invincibility down to my toes that I know will fade near the end of every race?
More importantly.... why do I let you?
And now, hands still warm from the cup of my weekend treat.... I dialled my most spontaneous guides number.... and ask that quizzical question that has been nagging my deeper consciousness...... "how would you feel about captaining my fixed gear tandem bike for 90km?"
I expected a laugh, a giggle, a moment of silence to suggest how insane I actually feel.
I get hardly to end of my question, barely to the intonation that should come when asking, and theres a "YES!" on the other end.
Then I get myself deeper into dreamland with every breath....
The commentary continues with much discussion of whether my tandem will actually survive such a distance. We decide my 1970's Doris is solid enough. We assume we are both crazy, I mean determined, enough. We conclude that we must conclude our conversation, our fantasy aired out loud.... we seem to both finish elated.
And in the next moment, with my hands still warm from that magical cup of cheap coffee.... the realization of the impending half ironman in July I just committed to.... Sinks down to the synaptic clefts of my every nerve impulse... Reality, it seems, leaks a bit of lactic acid with every neural firing.. leaving behind just enough of a kick in the ass to get me moving.....
Time to make my training plan. Time to write my eulogy. Or perhaps, time to stop pretending to be brave and actually start being so.
Either way, it is time.
peace to you in running and more..... on this freezing day 379 of running :)